and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
