She went from zero to smokin in five shots
well you can't waste a boner
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize