Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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