no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I wish you could order shots online.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
