i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Randomize
