My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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