Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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