"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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