They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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