I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
