the condom got lost in my hair
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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