omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
