i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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