let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
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Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize