Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
