just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
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he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
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He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"