theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
