about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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