i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
