so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
