So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize