It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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