i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
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