Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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