i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Randomize
