The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize