My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
