I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
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Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
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Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it