I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
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