this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
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Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
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