I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
