Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
The ass gains better be worth it
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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