I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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