They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
We need a shit load of segways right now
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Randomize
