I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Randomize
