I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I am mentally ready for anal.
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