Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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