Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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