Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
