Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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