that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
