I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Randomize