your thong is hanging out like whoa
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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