I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
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