This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Randomize
