HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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