Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
