Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Randomize
