I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Randomize
