I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
