just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize