the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Small penises have feelings too.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
